What Do You Need?

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I want to help you as much as I can. In order to do that, I need to know what YOU would like help with.

  • Do you need help overcoming your fear?
  • Do you need to know the best ways to prepare or practice for your speech?
  • Do you want to know if imagining the audience in their underwear is really a good way to relax?

Any topic is valid. I want to make sure that you get the most out of this site.

So, here’s what I would like you to do. Leave a comment with your question and I’ll do my best to answer your questions or point you in the right direction.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Until then, speak well!

Dan

6 Comments so far
  1. Joel March 10, 2010 12:36 pm

    thanks for offering such a wonderful information to the needy.
    my problem is exactly trembling and speeaking with a shaky voice in public. once in front i feel alot of fear emanating from within. please help.

  2. Dan Girard March 10, 2010 10:27 pm

    I can understand where you’re coming from. Most people who have a fear of public speaking are afraid of making a mistake. They get really nervous because they don’t want to look bad in front of a crowd. That makes them even more nervous which makes them feel like they are going to make a mistake. And this just gets worse over time.

    One piece of advice I like to give is to have people talk to strangers. I know this sounds weird but it works. Start by saying hello to a store clerk. You don’t have to talk about anything else. But when you say hello, look them in the eye and really mean it. Say “Hello, how are you?”. Once you have mastered that, you can try to continue the conversation. Ask them how their day is going. Soon you will be able to begin a conversation with a total stranger.

    Why this helps with public speaking is that it helps you control your fear of talking to people you don’t know. It also gives you more confidence (in general) which can help you feel less afraid when you are in front of a crowd. And the less afraid you feel the more confident you become. And that goes on and on. Eventually you could learn to enjoy speaking in front of people.

    I hope this helps. Good luck and speak well!

  3. Hope September 5, 2010 4:42 pm

    Hi Dan, my situation is that the thought of speaking to strangers put me in nervous situation.This makes me have this shaky voice and my heart pounds.At times my mind will just go blank not knowing what to say when any social contact takes place.In fact am not enjoying my social life and is really painful to me seeing opportunities pass by.

  4. Dan Girard September 9, 2010 9:09 pm

    I understand where you’re coming from. I was like that too. I was the most shy kid you would ever meet. The best way to get over this is to start small. You can start with just saying “Hi” to the checkout clerk at the store. Ask how their day is going. Be interested and they will respond. From there you can move on and continue the conversation. Ask if it’s been busy. Compliment them on a piece of jewelry or clothing. Eventually you should be able to carry on a full conversation with a stranger. This will help with your social anxiety. This also helps with public speaking panic.

    Best of luck.

  5. Dany April 30, 2012 4:26 pm

    Hi Dan
    only the thought of talking three minutes in front an audience/conference call (indeed even a conference call without people staring at me!) ruins my sleep weeks before ‘the day’. Unfortunately even if I try to concentrate on ‘positive thoughts’ about the speech inevitably my mind goes to the worst scenario. I do know I need help therefore I joined the toastmaster club…after 6 times still I haven’t had the courage to talk! Please help!

  6. Dan Girard July 17, 2012 7:46 am

    Dany,

    Sorry for taking sooooo long to get back to you. I hope that you’re improving.

    The best advice I can give is to start small. I would start with interacting more with people you see everyday. This includes clerks at the store, people you run into everyday. For example, the next time you’re at the grocery store, ask the clerk “How’s your day going?”. That’s it. Just listen to what they say. Keep trying this over and over. Soon, you should find that you can carry on a short conversation.

    Here’s an example that happened to me the other day. I was at Wendy’s (a fast food restaurant if you’re not familiar with them). The girl who rang me up had a name tag that said “Wendy”. All I did was say “Is your name REALLY Wendy?”. She said, “Yeah, how do you think I got this job” and then she smiled. We both had a good laugh.

    You just have to take the chance and put yourself out there. The more you talk to people (especially people you don’t know), the more comfortable you will feel talking in front of people.

    Best of luck.

    Dan

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